Article Society

I know exactly what you're going through. I've been where you are and I remember all too clearly the pain that I felt in the days and weeks after my breakup. Feelings of hopelessness, depression and anxiety come and go. But what can you do to get back to living life or at least lessen those awful feelings after your breakup? What can you do when you've lost hope completely in trying to win your ex back?

While other people may encourage you to simply move on and forget about your ex, I encourage you to keep your dream alive. If getting back together with your boyfriend or your husband is honestly what is going to make you happy then that is what you need to do. If the love that you once felt together was something unique and special then you shouldn't just throw it away. Don't' quit. Don't give up. You simply can't replace someone you love with any other human being.

There will be times when you are going to have bad days. You'll have days when you will feel like leaving work and crawling up in a ball on the couch but you'll also have good days eventually. There will be a day when you start to see progress and mysterious things will happen in your life as your ex starts to come back to you. The challenge is getting through those difficult days and working through the pain and emotions. There will be days when you're going to feel like you're on the edge of tears. So, what can you do during those trying times to get through the day?

Take a deep breath and acknowledge these feelings. Understand that these emotions and feelings are only there to try to help you. Our emotions either motivate us to do things or not do things based upon pain and pleasure. If we think that something is going to cause us pain then it's going to be difficult to motivate ourselves to do anything that will bring us closer to that pain. To overcome that pain avoidance reflex, we need to associate those same thoughts with pleasure.

For instance, you are depressed because you do want to get back together with your ex but you know that there might be a lot of pain associated with getting him back. He could reject you again. It might take a long time to get him back during which time you might have to deal with knowing that the man that you love is with someone else or dealing with his indifference. But if you can spend some time reliving the pleasant feelings about your relationship and trying to keep a positive attitude they you stand a very good chance of weathering the storm until he does come back to you.

There will be times when you feel like just giving up. The pain is going to be there waiting for you from time to time. Your job is to look to the future and know without a doubt that the day will come when your ex will think of you and reach out to you if you play your cards right. Be brave enough to dream that dream. Don't let anyone steal that dream from you or tell you that it will never happen. It's entirely up to you and if you are patient and clever enough you really can win your ex back no matter what the circumstances are. No matter how bad things might seem, time will change everything if you simply let it.